Title: The Big Goodbye
Original Air moment: January 11, 1988
Written By: Tracy Torme
Directed by: Joseph L. Scanlan
Episode: S01E012
Stardate: 41997.7

The Enterprise is on a diplomatic mission to Alderaan, and the imperial senate will not stand for — oh. Wait. Sorry. Wrong Star. Let’s start by, shall we?

The Enterprise is on a diplomatic mission to meet the Jarada, an alien species with a peculiar affinity for protocol: whether Picard doesn’t speak a specific greeting in precisely the right way at precisely the right moment, the Jaradan won’t join the Federation, and they’ll take all their mythical Jaradan weed with them.

Picard and Counselor Troi have been practicing his speech for hours, considering it is just about the most urgent thing Picard has done since convincing Q that

humanity isn’t a bunch of asscocks. considering he is so aware of the significance of the meeting, he naturally closes up his books and heads down to the holodeck to goof off. (If my son Ryan, who is about to enter college, is reading that, please don’t follow his example whether you mean to graduate in four years. Keep studying. Your grades and my money thank you.)

Picard tells us in his personal log that he’s looking forward to trying out something new called a holodeck program: rather than simply recreating a date or a place (or both) it recreates an entire fictional universe inside the Enterprise (infinite recursion ready! Infinite recursion sharp!) with characters and a story, sort of like LARPing, whether LARPing wasn’t totally lame.

Continue reading Star Trek: The Next Generation: The Big Goodbye